I have masturbating quite regularly since college days.Recently I met with a girl and we got into close relationship very soon. The topic of masturbation did not come in discussion until we decided to marry each other. When I mentioned to her about this, she got very angry and started talking as if I have been cheating her all along. She is saying, she never masturbated. How do I perform a sexual act without her involvement and knowledgement.
Our relations are disturbed with this. Am I doing anything wrong? I should have informed her earlier about all my habits before really getting into serious relationship. Pls advise me.
leave the girls alone and get involve with a woman
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February 10th, 2010 at 2:32 pm
no. she’s weird.
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February 10th, 2010 at 3:18 pm
She’ll grow out of it with experience.
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February 10th, 2010 at 3:27 pm
No. It’s human. She’s uptight and is not connected to her sexuality. How can you be a good lover if you don’t know what you like? How can you teach the other person if you are disconnected from your body?
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February 10th, 2010 at 4:07 pm
leave the girls alone and get involve with a woman
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February 10th, 2010 at 4:30 pm
Masturbation is perfectly normal. Even babies in the womb masturbate. Women masturbate too.
So your girlfriend is flying off the handle over a normal sexual act.
And who or what were you supposed to be cheating on her with – your hand?
OK dear one, you and your girl friend sound like you are from very conservative people. Girls especially from conservative background are often ill-informed about sexual acts. I suggest you both go to the doctor together and discuss this openly and frankly. Perhaps her attitude may change. Otherwise I doubt you two will be happy together. So find this out before you marry – and cause even more difficulty for each other.
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February 10th, 2010 at 4:38 pm
compare masturbation to cheating is going a little over board. She is over reacting. I mean I don’t care that long as my husband wants to have sex with me
and what he does under the shower it is his sweet business 
K
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February 10th, 2010 at 5:13 pm
I honestly couldn’t tell you if my husband masturbates outside of when we are together or not. I would rather not know. That is his business and I just try to give him what he needs so that he won’t feel obligated to do that. If he told me he masturbated regularly (I would say more than once a week), I would be very hurt and feel like I wasn’t enough for him. So I guess what I am saying is, you should have kept it to yourself!
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February 10th, 2010 at 5:30 pm
You can’t cheat by playing with yourself. Cheating involves two people. Your penis doesn’t count as a person.
She is very strange or very insecure. In either case i recommend AT LEAST putting off the wedding. At MOST i suggest moving on because there is a chance she is unlikely to change her view of the subject.
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February 10th, 2010 at 5:51 pm
Masturbating is normal. She is probably upset within herself because she might feel you are doing it because she is not satisfying you enough – she is taking it personally. I don’t believe she never masturbated – and I would ask her if she has orgasms when you both have sex – because if she says yes she does, then I’m telling you she has masturbated. Anyhow, just tell her it has nothing to do with her satisfying you, and that it is normal. If she does not like it, just do it when she is not around.
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February 10th, 2010 at 6:02 pm
Honesty is everything!
Don’t lie to her or hide stuff from her, if you are doing something that you won’t regret, then you have nothing to hid.
I think it’s disgusting, but I do know that men do it, and sometimes it saves me from having to have sex all the time!
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February 10th, 2010 at 6:41 pm
She is definitely over reacting, but if this is any indication of the way you two communicate then don’t get married.
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February 10th, 2010 at 6:49 pm
She has serious issues. Fear of Intimacy.
Basically, this is called being a Sex Addict. (her, not you, lol!) – only, she’s a type of sex-addict who undergoes what is called "Sexual Anorexia" – she is offended by her own natural and normal bodily functions. Most likely due to some form of sexual trauma or abuse as a child; could have been rape, could have simply been someone teaching her that sex is dirty and it’s a sin for her to be sexual.
On the other hand, if you are choosing masturbation over sex with your wife – well, then that’s a problem. You have fear of intimacy issues.
Either way – this fear drives a wedge between you two – the relationship often grows cold, without that intimacy and trust, and loneliness sets in. The sex addict is unable to deal with this internal pain, so they seek out other partners. If they’re in deep denial, it may just be that they flirt with members of the opposite sex, or even just don’t enforce proper boundaries, so that they are likely to become a victim of a predator. Anything to soothe their loneliness.
The ironic thing is that these people who are so shocked and offended by their own sexuality, will go so far as to have sex with a stranger in a hotel room, to fulfill the needs that they can’t bear to fulfill with their spouse – because anonymous sex is safe (emotionally), they don’t have to explain it to anyone, especially to their spouse. This conflict can cause them to have deep denial, and even delusional states of mind. They often become depressed, irrational, and angry.
You guys need too see a therapist. Make sure they have a CSAT certification.
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February 10th, 2010 at 7:11 pm
It all depends. If you and your girl are having sex it could be that you saying you masturbate offended her and she took it to mean that she isnt satisfying you. Try talking to her again about it. let her know that you masturbating has nothing to do with how well she is satisfying you, but as a young male you have urges. You should also try to cut back on it some though. it will be easier for you to satisfy her if you arnt always self gratifying and try to hold back some.
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February 10th, 2010 at 7:27 pm
yes
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~The Fat Man
February 10th, 2010 at 7:57 pm
99% of adult (men/women) masturbate and remaining 1% either they are lying, ill or ignorant about the act. I seriously doubt about the statement of your lady saying she never done it. If she is ignorant about the act, please make her understand that it is absolutely okay to masturbate. It is the safest way of controlling one’s sexual urge and it is bilogical need of the body.
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February 10th, 2010 at 8:43 pm
tell her its all normal n ask him not to act weird
u havnt cheated as u were not involved wid any girl
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February 10th, 2010 at 8:58 pm
man dis is like too much! she is over reacting, derz nothing wrong masturbating even girls do masturbate tat doesn’t mean she’s cheating after all its all natural and nothing to feel bad about it. probably she might be ignorant go ahead and hv a talk.
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