I am miserable, bored, and ready to give up! I can’t seem to do anything right and really neither can he. He is not abusive or anything and he says he loves me, but I don’t really feel anything for him lately. We have been married for 13 years and have 4 kids from 13-10 months. I am not a quitter, I believe in "till death do you part" but I am just confused and need some comforting words or advise. Please help !
It sounds like your over whelmed is what the problem is. You two probably don’t take time for the two of you alone anymore. Your working on the family and letting the marriage slip…which is what happens to a lot of couples. Try taking time out at least once a week to rekindle the marriage…get a baby sitter and go out…just the two of you.
An affirmation of Love
Duration : 13 min 36 sec
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If you do, how do you know that you still love your partner and they still love you? How do you measure if it is better to stay together or split? How do you work the problems out?
Of course every couple has problems. Its part of life and a part of marriage. If anyone tells you they don’t have problems within their marriage, they must be lying.
When my husband and I have something that bothers one of us or causes us to argue, then we rationally talk it out. Usually, we drop the subject and let each other cool down. Once we are both level headed, we approach the issue together and communicate about it. We try to be upfront about it and work it out. Anytime we get mad at each other, we BOTH appologize for our words or actions. For example, a few days ago, he was playing a game on the XBOX while I was trying to have a serious convo with him, and it made me upset. I told him to IM me when he was ready to devote his undivided attention to me about our family situation. He got upset with me, and it became a stupid petty little tiff. So after we stopped bickering, I appologized to him for being snappy about things, and for giving him attitude, and in return, he appologized for not being completely devoted to the conversation in question. We both appologized for things we did wrong, and we are specific so that the other knows that we truly learned a lesson from the tiff. We were then able to come to a mutual agreement so that the arguement doesn’t occur again. We agreed that when he is gaming, he will say "hey sweetie, I am in the middle of a game, let me get to a stopping point and I will give you my full attention," and in return I agree and thank him for the heads up.
For my husband and I, communication is the best way to work out our issues and prevent more issues from arising. We feel that no arguement is too small or too big to work out. When we said our vows, we promised to stick by what we said, so there’s not an option to run away scared. It won’t solve anything.
Just because people argue or go through bad times doesn’t mean they love each other any less. Marriage has its ups and its downs, just like everything else in life. How you approach it is what makes all the difference.
Numerous women write to me in a depressed, sometimes even suicidal state of mind as a result of their marriage crisis. I created this video so as to give such women renewed hope and strength in such times. Let Spirit call you by name and touch you. *Please note that you are adviced to seek professional medical help always.*
Duration : 0:4:38
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In this segment, I am dealing with the real life question how do women think. Based on my experiences, this is something that is a particularly daunting subject for some. The reason is because we are either taught to be believe certain things by way of the media or Hollywood and assume things are that way or we don’t often enough try to look at things from the other persons perspective. So in this segment, I discuss things that guys should consider when dealing with a woman they are in a relationship that could pave the way to better communication. This is just based off of real life experiences and reading that I have done. So FYI… if you are having serious problems I recommend that you go to a marriage counselor. Otherwise this is just good discussion and food for thought.
Duration : 0:9:24
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Or in other words why divorce?
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Not if you have children. It would compound your problems and your children would be the losers.
Holy matrimony between Bro Hanock Thapa and Sis Muna Thapa
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Duration : 56 min 2 sec
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I know i wouldnt cause if he/she couldnt make their own marriage work then their the wrong person to seek advice from..And yea i know what everybody is gonna say that they have experience and you can learn from their mistakes but i still wouldnt..
Ok yea "would"
Yes. I know way more about marriage now than I did before or while I was married. The worst advice I got was from my MIL who has been married 47 years. The reason she has been married that long is b/c she put up with all kinds of crap, verbal and emotional abuse. Her advice was so wrong for me. I am much stronger than that and have chosen not to put up with what she did.
Just because someone has been married for a while does not mean that they have a good marriage or the kind of marriage you would want. So, I say take advice from both married and divorce people. The more experiences the better!
Sal The Stockbroker tells the Stern crew that there is no update on his marriage, then proceeds to give them a lengthy update. Good old Sal. From 6-19-07.
Duration : 0:9:46
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For the last 19 days I have slept 3 to 5 hours per night – I need to sleep more. What can I do? My wife left and I am distraught. I’m going to counseling but when I am home I can not sleep but a few hours…
HELP!
19 days? Time heals, but if you truly loved her, this is not enough time. Stop thinking so much about the negative things involved. The bottom line, YOU are keeping yourself from sleeping. Morn your loss, but then stop the self pity and get moving on living your life. No one else is responsible for making you happy. Spend time with family and friends and by all means, DO NOT focus on all your sorrows in your conversations, only as needed and with some level of control if you find that is all your talking about, then move on to happier subjects as not to leave your listener with too much of your grief. They need to know there you have strength in you as well and together you can get through this easier and faster. People are much more willing to help those who are willing to help themselves as well.